searching for my polestar

Monday, February 27, 2006

i think therefore i am.

i think im turning dumb. i think i cant mix well with people anymore. (e.g. just now in nj). i realise i cant talk to ppl anymore. (seewah) i guess i am blushing whenever someone mentions i like someone. which i do but i dont want to. cos it's stupid. cos i know it's fruitless. cos i know i shouldnt like but im still liking anyway. i think im turning tired right now. cos my eyelids are drooping. my bed is beckoning to me. i am not heeding its call. i think i should sleep now. but i dont feel like cos i havent touch my chem and bio tutorial. i think i should heck care those tutorials cos they r unimpt and sleep is the more impt thing right now. i think i should erase whatever thoughts i have in my mind right now, treat myself as a happy little dwarf and just lull myself to sleep. but i cant. cos i know. cos i still think negative thoughts. i still think how stupid i am. and i know.

i know im dumb. just dont mention that. i do have self realisation.

wen en_

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

and people. im back. after a not so long period of time, it struck me. i am not getting lazier afterall. i am just getting more and more tired. then i got reminded of the njc's coming late day tmr. HCI, please do something, let us come late too.

huang cheng is like a part of my life right now. i will describe this part of life since no one ever heard of it. have you? basically at around 4pm, i will approach this classroom labelled b103 or b104 or b102. something like tt. i recognise the classroom but not the name. anyway, we will slack in there until the actors actually start acting! then we will have remotely something to do. we will climb this ultra high four storeys of stairs. im not in nj. im not used to stairs. hci is not stairs friendly. we love open ground! anyway, we will reach this storeroom thingy which reminds me of the old cl storeroom. and the big job begins. the opening of the blasted lock. it took me a few days to learn. it's that kind of turning right left right kind of lock. but sometimes when lady luck is not shining upon me, i cant open it either.

anyway. the people i hang out with. mostly it's my yin xiang mates. let me name them just for fun.
WEN EN
ZI XIAN
JAMIE
DAO TENG
YING JIE
MEI HUI
WEI QUAIN
SYLVIA
AI ZHEN
HENG JIE

ok. and other ppl frm other teams that i know.

SUQ PING
QUI JU
EUGENE
SAMUEL
LI LING
SZE HWEE

and some ppl whom i know them. but i know nuts of their name. im slow. i know.

i know you guys r not in a least bit interested but im spamming nonetheless. as u can see. im lazy to reach to my deep trove of treasure of lame pics. i know u guys love them. but im tired. im tired. im tired.

but if anyone wants to ask me out for a movie, im game for it. i want to go to a cinema badly. need some other life other than huang cheng. only applicable for sundays only. lol. maybe i shall be kind. im a nice person after all. and i bet u guys look weird in ur nj uniforms too. so stop telling me i look weird in hci uni.

ok. this is one ultra inane picture. i know u will go like what the hell?

Thursday, February 16, 2006

somehow, i am not contented anymore. not contented with the lot i have in life. i want more. maybe it's because im growing up. maybe it's the hormones that is playing tricks on me. i need some satisfaction in life. i need to be contented. maybe it's my friends. but whatever, i need to get my gp review done first.

Friday, February 10, 2006

i am staying. at least i should be. hci has no point in kicking out those with 7 points right? the rest of o lvl students in 06s77 did brillantly. joanne, sze hwee and weng chi scored 6. the rv girls came closely with 7. 4f did pretty well too, least for... congrats to both zhengjie and mingjun!!
for the recording of scores. did it cos nat did it. -_-'''

eng: a2 (mrs tan and mrs look)
hcl: a2
chem:a2 (sorry to mr. chow. i know i flunked that 10 marks qn)
phy:a1 (thanks to mrs lee)
hisT: a1 (MR LIM, i did it. lol)
ssg: a1 (yeah. i did pretty well for humanities. which often brings me back to the subj. why am i taking sci stream?)
maths: a1
amaths: A1 (kudos to mrs choy. i adore her son so much. sherwayn!)

i know i screwed my chem. everyone who knows me knows tt. how can i mistake two bloody curves are beyond me. well. to u know who, im sorry for everything. but life goes on. and appealing does work. it worked for ur senior. it should work for u. somemore recommendation letters are written. everything humanely possible will be done for u. so take care. take easy. and prepare ur appeal. =)

wen en_

p.s thanks u guys for the ultra sweet with a cherry on the top vday presents.

Thursday, February 09, 2006

i want to stay in hc. i hope people want me to stay in hc. so let me stay in hc. good luck. be confident. i will.

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

go figure. the first vday present i will recieve this year will be most prob my new phone. second the rose from seewah...anyone out there wants to be my valentine?

but firstly, to celebrate vday. my o lvl results must be pleasant enough. so this is a wish to god out there, please bless me to get the results i wish to attain.

wenen_

Saturday, February 04, 2006

well. i have calmed down. my parents dont blame me that much. i am as lucky as that.

so contact me in house. yeah. ermx.

for those ignorant. i lost my phone. BLEH. DAMN IT. yeah. sorry for unladylike behaviour. not that i care that much but still..

jah.

wen en_

Thursday, February 02, 2006

now, today was just weirded out. i suddenly came to knowledge of someone with someone, and another someone with someone. u guys should know who you are. well, it's just totally weird for me. maybe it's because it's new to me. i have always been teasing people about rumours that are not true. so it came kinda as a shock. we are all growing up, getting new experiences except for me. like i said, no one in their right state of mind will want me.

so people are feeling stressed over different things, o lvl results (which i believe is every single person out there who took their o lvls), homework (people like me who cant have time to do homework) and even just plain family matters, losing money over mahjong etc. all i want to say is to take it easy, esp the ones who just knew someone.

please update me on these matters that concern u asap. or else i feel that im like so innocent and ignorant on what's happening around me. it just freaks me out cos it just means we are drifting apart and i dont want that. cos remember, friends should last for a lifetime. so inform me about all the scandals around u, yes i heard about the joanne and zhengjie one. it's old. there's new ones surfacing about. feel free to tell me. so i at least im not so u know, like dumb.

another thing i want to add before i go, GO HUANG CHENG. everyone who counts themselves as good people should go. heard me? cos i will be there up there in the control room controlling the sound. keep a lookout for me towards the end. the cute me will appear!!!!

that's all. o level results will be good to us all. the turnover rate will be so low such as 0.00000000001%. everyone will get their ideal results. dont worry...

so stay happy. be happy. lol. =)

wen en_

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

seriously, i dont understand how people can be forced to write blog entries. yet here i am typing this entry beacause of someone's request. well, it chinese new year chu si. i welcome all invites for a mahjong session cos i need to win back money i have lost.

next, this is like the first in i dont know how long that i can go home at an early hour of 4 pm. that's like such a miracle. i dont know if this can stretch till tmr. evidently, i have nothing to say. when i have more energy which technically i should have since i gained weight, i will write more.

next to those people counting, i fell down again today. i must be unbalanced.